Well unfortunately I did not get the job I applied for. I say unfortunately but I am not sure that is accurate. All the platitudes in the world did not help me yesterday it was not fate, there is nothing just around the bloody corner I was incredibly angry.
Today I have perspective. I am a fatalist, what will be will be, whether there is a "higher being" that influences what happens to us or whether our future is pre ordained etc who knows but bottom line I did not get the job, get over it and move on!!!
My totally awesome husband (who is materialistically driven and incredibly stressed by the potential money problems I am about to cause) is being so completely supportive and unselfish I completely adore him! we spent ages last night talking about options some of which I had already discussed with my extremely sensible and pragmatic sister and I have some options open to me, some less savoury than others but all have to be considered. I refuse to make a knee jerk reaction to my blinkered perception of what may be a crap situation and see it for what it is still an opportunity to grasp my life with both hands and enjoy it! Yes money is an issue but so is quality of life and I will make the right decision at the right time.
I have put things in place over the last 24 hours...contingency plans if you like. I have emailed the CAB and am awaiting their advice on potential benefits I may be able to claim, not holding out much hope as this is a self inflicted situation! But you never know! I am going to a meeting next Tuesday with my local Business Link to develop and plan to boost my sales and identify potential sources of money to help me move my business forward. Making beads and jewellery full time or a lot more hours than I currently do is definitely an option and my gorgeous husband keeps talking about giving me his huuugeee shed to convert it to my workspace and set up a second station so I can offer tuition on a more permenant basis!
I have been to the bank manager and I MAY (MAY) be able to claim on my payment protection plan for my loan to help us out a bit. I say may but it is unlikely as I have had depression before and I should have 2 clear years before making a claim and you know what banks are like if there is a loophole they will exploit it!!! But again there is something I can explore to make our life a little easier for the moment!
I MAY be able to take a mortgage break or swap to interest only for a while again to help out. All things that are good to have in my armoury.
Options, options, options!!! All need careful consideration!
Right best go photograph my beads and bags whilst there is some sun and update my Etsy and website very soon and Imogen is off school today as it is student review day and I have an appointment for noon to see how her first year at senior school has gone!!!